Farming & Gardening as Anti-Perfectionism

Too many of us are expected to be perfect, in both overt and subtle ways. When working with teens or kids, they will occasionally comment that regardless of whether I validate their worth apart from grades - even if their parents validate their worth apart from grades, they still get the message from their teachers and classmates that grades are a huge part of their self-worth. As adults, this carries on in different forms. Made a small mistake at work? Many of us have had micromanaging bosses who are only too quick to point this out. Forget to text a friend? You might get labeled as flakey or uncaring. Not to mention media trying to sell us on any number of ambrosias for imaginary "flaws."

Let's face it, modern life is absolutely exhausting. I'm not saying that earlier times were easy - absolutely not. But we're all managing a million different tasks, errands, and plans. And don't even get me started on technology (that's a whole topic for another blog post...or three).

However, the more time I spend outdoors, the more I noticed the lack of perfectionism present in nature. There aren't clear demands that we respond to texts right this instant, implications that we need to have clear skin or an updated wardrobe, or that we must run errands imminently. Instead, we are met with the reality that nature is the way it is for a reason as an interconnected ecosystem and moreover, is perfect just the way it is.

In particular, nothing has taught me this as much as farming has. When I started farming a few years back on a whim, I thought I'd hate it. Lugging a wheelbarrow around and weeding until your knees ached seemed pretty unappealing. But pretty soon I started finding that I was catching "the farming bug." I missed the smell of the earth, getting down into the soil to plant or harvest, or even seeing the cast of critters that made appearances regularly. It felt good to be messy, unkempt, and contributing to something bigger than my life.

From the beginning of a season - signs of hope!

The funny truth to farming is that there are times when you accidentally neglect crops only to find them thriving when you return and on the contrary, there are times when you poured constant time and attention into crops, only to find that they've been picked apart by Japanese beetles in a matter of days, were wrecked by the weather (classic dilemma), or were eaten by any host of animals. In other words, farming and gardening are not for control freaks.

And that's why I recommend them so much. What's the fun of experiencing only things you have total or even partial control over? What's the fun of denying yourself the experience of letting go when it's safe to do so? What are you missing by micromanaging your life and giving into external pressures? I don't know about you, but needing constant control sounds exhausting - not fulfilling.

While we must follow many expectations in this day and age, we can't do ourselves the disservice of avoiding surrender. All said, I encourage you to think about how you can farm or garden: whether that's in your own backyard, a community garden, or even with a few houseplants. You might be surprised when you come to find that weeds aren't the only plants thriving - there may be a few flowers, too!